Change — the kind that is true and lasting — comes when you want to change more than you want to stay the same.

It’s January 2015 as I write this. I want to say this: A New Years resolution is great! Wanting to do better at something shows self-awareness, and that is excellent.

A caution: If you are only trying to make a change because you feel like you have to, or that you should… it probably won’t stick.

You need to take a long, hard look at yourself and examine your life. Think about your actual desires. Do you want to change? Do you want to stop drinking so much? Do you want to exercise more? Do you actually want to save money? Or do you enjoy spending money more than you do saving it?

You aren’t going to change unless you truly want to.

Right now as I write this (January 2015) I am dealing with a caffeine, alcohol, and melatonin addiction. It was killing my social life, unless I resorted to taking about 5-6 caffeine pills (1,000-1,200 mg) per day. That’s a dangerous amount. Caffeine isn’t bad at all, but at the dosage I was taking it, I was making it bad.

I cut out caffeine, cold turkey, because I decided that I didn’t want to take it anymore. Headaches will come, grogginess will envelop me, and I might have difficulty getting going in the morning. For a week or so. And then it’ll pass.

The reason I was able to change my habits is because I started to want to be caffeine-free more than I wanted to be using caffeine. I actually, legitimately did not want to take caffeine anymore, and that desire was greater than my desire to have caffeine.

That’s when change happens.

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